If we really stopped to think about it, each of our lives could be simplified into three things we all do, all the time: think, decide, and act. But it’s the decisions that seem to give us the biggest problem, and they never seem to stop coming. Every day, there’s a whole new batch of decisions to be made. Some of them are tedious: paper or plastic; regular or decaf; fries or chips. Occasionally, however, we are faced with a really important decision; one that will have a lasting impact. A decision that will reverberate throughout our future, sending ripples across the pond of our life story.
At the time, we may not think much of these situations. Often, they look just like all the hundreds of other decisions that we make every day. But don’t be fooled; there they are, waiting for us. Our very own black swan event, lying in wait, ready to trigger a chain of events that we’ll one day look back on as a turning point in our lives. And as we grow older, we may one day fondly recall the event that forever changed our life for the better, or curse the day that everything fell apart.
From one extreme to the other: great or catastrophic. But either way, there it is. Right in front of us, patiently waiting on us to do something. Fate, poised like a grand master, sitting across the chess board, firmly in control of the game. We’re hopelessly out-matched and she knows it. But she’s not smugly content; she’s just there. No emotion; no smirk rising from her lips. She’s sitting there, waiting for our next move. Just waiting.
Waiting on us.
What will we do? What move do we make? We can’t help but think “If I only had a crystal ball, this would be all so simple.” If only we knew what was next to come. If we do this, what happens? What if we do that? If only we could wave a magic wand and see into the future, things would be so much easier.
But no, there is no crystal ball, no magic wand, no fortune teller to ease our fears. No playbook that we can follow. There’s only us, our experience, insight, and luck.
Just us.
Sure, we can ask for advice. We can look to friends, family, and mentors for guidance. But, in the end, it’s only us.
All us.
It’s all just me.
So, we think, what if we do nothing? Paralysis by analysis, they call it. We can’t decide the best path forward, so we rebel. We simply wait: do nothing and see what happens. Well, that’s still doing something, isn’t it? We’re still making a choice on our future; still moving the needle. We’re just not the one pulling the strings. We’re relying on someone or something else to move us forward. Or is it backward? Do nothing and like it. Or don’t. Can’t I just make a choice!
But, in the end, we’ve got to do something. Doing nothing feels like a cop out. Only losers do nothing. We think “Damn it, at least make a choice!” So, we do.
We decide.
Me.
But, what’s the choice? How do we decide? What is the opportunity here? Is it to grow; to move ahead? Or maybe it’s to pull back and regroup, doing a deeper assessment of the situation and the new suite of options we face.
It’s rare that we know the real implications of our decisions. There is no crystal ball, only our thoughts and expectations. We can only imainee the future; we can’t predict it. And until someone does invent a crystal ball, our ideas and our imagination are all that we have to work with.
So, what the hell are we supposed to do in these situations? I wish I had an answer for you (and me as well); I really do. Unfortunately, even the smartest people in the world can’t predict the future.
So, what’s left? The best we can do is to follow the pattern laid out by the brightest minds of history. Gather as much information as we can and make an informed decision.
Do the research. Examine the options. Seek the advice of a mentor.
It may not be a perfect plan, but, really, there never is a perfect plan, is there?
Just do something and see what happens. We can always make adjustments later.
Just do something.
Do nothing, and nothing happens. Life is about decisions. You either make them or they’re made for you, but you can’t avoid them.
Mhairi McFarlane
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